A few years ago a client shared with me their paradox of “when is enough enough?” She was on a quest to have it all, be it all, and be the best at it all. In fact, she likened this desire to a ‘Stepford wife’ scenario, mimicking the perfect drones from the original movie. Logically, we know perfection is unachievable, as interpreted by her definition. Yet, this gnawing achievement orientation is real for many people.
What I would like to propose is that the synonym for perfect is: “complete, the whole of all there is; every part, not divided; the entirety.” Thus, to be perfect means embracing all aspects of ourselves – our whole selves – and knowing that this is more than enough in its entirety. The parts which are still growing, our mistakes, our contributions, our experiences, our ongoing lessons, and our accomplishments – make up our whole. We are already perfect by embracing all of ourselves and knowing that the quest for perfection is the road and journey we are on – not a destination.
Very true, but there is another more negative aspect of perfectionism, co-dependency and self destruction. When we cannot accept our own inperfecyions or those of others it can lead to other addictive behaviors.